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As soon as we moved to Nederland, we learned that dance is majorly popular here.  My girls have never had the opportunity to take dance. Here, you would have a hard time escaping it as there is a dance studio on every corner. I immediately said no (to myself) when confronted with the question "Are they going to take dance?".  My swift answer came for two reasons. First of all, upon moving here I immediately met several dance instructors like Dawn and my neighbor Petrina; both super sweet.  I heard raving reviews on them as well as dozens of other dance instructors in town.  How could I possibly choose one over the other?  But that wasn't my big reason for saying no.

I realize I risk sounding like less than the banner mother, but truth be known, I am not a fan of sequins.  I love the way they look, but only when I don't have to mess with them.  I managed recently to fail in applying iron-on badges, which I feel disqualifies me from being a sequin mom.  So I posed a question to those who would suggest certain dance studios: What's the sequin count? (implying that only a very low count would be acceptable). In my book a low sequin count indicates a low level of effort and dedication which I'm perfectly fine with.  To aid in my negative response, I shared that Hallie doesn't even like to dance.

Early in the year, we learned of the Saturday clinics offering a day of instruction and fun for girls.  There was a Westernaire, Goldenettes, Cheerleading and Twirling Clinic.  Hallie surprised me by deciding to go to the Twirling Clinic.  Long story short (not really-I don't think I'm capable of that) both of the girls loved the twirling.  And while I don't know if twirling is really considered dancing, I'm going to go with it.  I was really excited because Twirls and Swirls is a studio owned and run by generations of sweet ladies from our church.  We love Ms. Phyllis, Ms. Dorothy,Rebecca and Rachel.

And get this, Twirls and Swirls Sequin Count:Low to zero!

Rylie's recital outfit has no sequins. Hallie's outfit is covered with sequins, but I don't have to apply them. The cost for Twirls and Swirls is also more than reasonable.  I love this place!

Speaking of the upcoming recital, I have a challenge ahead of me.  Hallie and Rylie will be performing a Sisters Routine.  I read over the note describing the matching outfits the girls will wear for this special routine.

 Now don't laugh.  I get to design them-using sequins; oh the irony! 

This will be my first time applying sequins for a recital.  I'm not counting the time last summer when I tried to apply red sequins to bling the heart on my- I heart VBS t-shirt.  By the way, the applying went fine.  It was the washing the shirt afterward that went badly.

This morning I had my Dr. Pepper and a little bit of meditation  I began to consider how much effort I wanted to put into this. What will my sequin count be? Afterall, my girls love twirling.  And I love watching them.  I know too that twirling is teaching them so many important things.  All of the ladies that work with the girls are patient and wonderful women of God.  My girls see Rebecca and Rachel as young ladies who are brilliant in twirling and who serve brightly in the church too.  Both of my girls have made new friends at twirling.  I believe twirling has in part, helped Hallie come out of her shell. Rylie told me that her twirling teacher Rachel never gives up on her, thank you for that.  The cost for twirling is NOTHING compared to the benefits!

Oh!  Isn't this like our relationship with God!  Blessings from him flow and I find myself unwilling to make an effort to do my part.  Read my Bible EVERYDAY?  Can't I get a break?  How many times do we have to be at the church this week?

The sequin count required to be a Christian is zero.  God requires nothing of us aside from our trust in him and repentance from our old life.  But in light of his goodness, shouldn't we, in gratitude, be looking for ways to give him thanks and bring him glory?  In my life and in my ways, shouldn't I have a desire to glow brilliantly for him?

Shouldn't my sequin count for Christ be countless?

Those who are wise will shine like the brightness of heaven, and those who lead many to righteousness, like the stars forever and ever.  -Daniel 12:3

I must close now as I have sequins to buy and apply.

 

Wish me luck!

Recital pictures to come

If you missed yesterday's post in honor of mothers, check it out. Things Learned Though Mom Never Shared

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Yes she thought that burgundy corduroy blazer with matching pants that she made you wear was cute.

She also really thought that school picture, the one where your teeth were almost as big as your head, was adorable. -Even more so as you have grown

She did cherish each paper that you brought home with your name on it-even the ones she stuffed deep down into the trash bag.

She really wanted to be your friend, but knew that you needed her to be your mother even more.

She really can smell vomit, even if she seems immune to its smell.

She had bad hair days, and days with no make-up, not because she didn't care what she looked like, but because she put your needs first.

She didn't always enjoy cooking, and she never enjoyed scrubbing toilets.

There were times that she let your room be messy or ignored that eye-roll and let you think you got away with it.

She never felt so much rage toward a person until you came along and someone did you wrong.

She never felt so much fear as the times she's had to let you go somewhere; without her there by your side.

Maybe, most importantly, she's never felt so much joy as the first time she held you, the first time you said "ma-ma" or the the time you gave your heart to Jesus.

She really cared more about how you were doing in school than she did about your grades.

Every contest you entered, she thought you should have won- even if she didn't tell you so.

She didn't care much for Mazzios pizza or watching Pippy Longstockings.

Your clothes didn't just "come clean" in the wash; she sometimes had to scrub them.

She never dreamed of being a taxi cab driver, but she didn't mind being yours.

She knew money didn't grow on trees, but sometimes she spent it on you selflessly for something she wanted you to have.

She hasn't shared EVERY embarrassing story about you.

Grounding you and sticking to it was not easy; spanking you wasn't either.

She's MORE proud of you than she lets you know; most of the time she's letting other people how proud she is of you.

Even though it seemed sometimes she wasn't listening, there were ten times those times that she was thinking only of you.

Even when you asked her to watch you do some cool trick, but she seemed distant, you must know that you were never NOT on her mind.

She cried tears for you that you never saw, smiled smiles too, prayed prayers on your behalf that you never heard, and felt butterflies too when you were doing something "big" like performing or driving or taking a big test.

Maybe she hasn't told you, but she wants you to know- that it's YOU, not any homemade or expensive present, that she counts as her greatest gift.  And every day, not just Mother's Day, she counts it a blessing to call herself your mother.

 

For my mom, Gaye Fowler

Happy Mother's Day

and Happy Birthday May 14

Love you!

 

 

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You're the ONLY ONE  who can be you.

Don't miss out!

 Hallie, pictured above, is like no other.  It's one of the things I love about her the most.  Through the years much time has been spent in a distant land known as "Hallie World".  She made the rules, and not everybody was allowed to visit.

 There was also a time she started noticing a bit of hair on her legs.  She thought her neck was growing longer too. She was convinced she was turning into a horse.

For two years of her life she referred to herself as "White Kitty".  Many mornings she literally crawled out of bed,......and then kept on crawling.

 An individual creature for sure!

This is a picture of Hallie, Rylie and our fabulous friends Laurie and Ronique.

there's only one hallie

 rylie, there's no parallel

laurie you're matchless

ronique, you're it girl

 -4 sweet girls with much to share

Thank you God for our sames and differences.

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For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place.

-Psalm 139:13-15a

Most everybody knows and LOVES this verse.  I know it has been used to advocate for the unborn; I’ve used it that way myself.  While it speaks to the life that begins in the womb, it speaks beyond.  I remember thinking initially when Hayden was born, that he was perfect.  Ten perfect toes.  Perfect fingers that immediately grasped mine. That misconception was quickly killed.  I’ll never forget our shock when Hayden had that first “welcome to parenting” tarry black diaper that spilled over the sides as Jason and I (yes both of us) attempted to change him.  Jason went immediately to get the nurse; he jokes now that he thought Hayden was broken.  With each of our much adored children, we have had constant reminders that they’re not perfect, but they’re straight from God who has created them uniquely and according to his plan.  And that we can’t forget.

 

Diagnoses increase every year; new disorders are identified all the time. One disorder, dyslexia, has gained recognition over the last fifteen years. I have had the privilege of identifying and teaching intervention to students with dyslexia.  I never had the dream of teaching dyslexia, but twelve years ago I had a precious student who struggled learning to read and write.  He had a persistent and heart-broken mother who would stop at nothing to help him.  In my inadequacy and in fear of this mama bear who was confronting the problem, I found myself searching for the cause of his struggle and for ways to help him.  I won’t lie.  That was a rough year.  I will say though, that working with students with dyslexia, and their parents, has become a true passion of mine.  I hope to always convey some reality to those struggling with dyslexia:

  It doesn’t identify who you are.

  Though there is difficulty involved, don’t ignore the beauty that comes along with a brain that is wired differently. 

People with dyslexia are usually extraordinarily creative.  Their giftedness is many times overlooked. These children are often persistent, ambitious, curious, imaginative, with excellent reasoning; the list goes on.  The same is so with other disorders.

Going even further, whether it's dylexia ,or another disorder, a noticeable birthmark or being extraordinarily tall- those who are viewed as dissimilar are at times rejected or even pitied.    They are viewed as a spectacle; or sometimes face feeling isolated and ignored.   The way people stare and what we imagine people are thinking can get the best of us.  Whether we are discreet and secretive of our child’s difference, or we are angry at the world demanding everyone accept our child for the way she is, or both- the simple but vital question remains.

Is the way we view our child’s difference, in light of God’s good and perfect word? 

I’ve come to dislike the word disorder. One of my children has been diagnosed twice with a disorder.  I want to be familiar with the struggles that may come along with that diagnosis, and with ways to help my child, but it will not overwhelm who my child is.  She has ADHD.  He has Aspergers.  He has Bipolar Disorder.   To say that a child has a disorder can insinuate there was a malfunction in his ordering or in his formation; like something went wrong.

When we say along with the Psalm, I am wonderfully made; does that just refer to our parts which seem normal or like everybody else?

When God says he “knit us together” and that our frame “was not hidden from {him}” do we believe that; do we know it “full well”?

We may wonder what we did wrong or didn’t do right.  Or we blame God.

 Could it possibly be, that we what we see as different or label a disorder, God sees as having beautiful purpose?

My children are so diverse.  Hallie has a large space bubble; only few are welcomed inside.  I think the first sentence we taught her was "I need my space".  Hayden, on the other hand, wants to touch EVERYTHING. I have his permission in telling you all of this. When he was younger, I had to watch to make sure he didn’t touch the cake at a wedding.  He wanted to touch other people’s food.  One time at HEB he ran his hand along a shelf of small potted plants sending them to the floor, spilling everywhere.  I’ve been embarrassed at times, and other times angry, like the time someone criticized his touching all the cookies saying he put his germs on them.

I remember a specific moment when we were checking out at Wal-Mart, not that many years ago.  As my purchases were being sacked, I noticed Hayden lifting up the conveyor belt and looking under it touching what was underneath.  The lady behind us stared.  But at that moment, I felt God whisper that it was ok.  I began to think that maybe God created him to touch.  I can’t recall how many times his hug or an awkward arm around my shoulder has reminded me that I am loved as his mother.   He’s crafted some meaningful, beautiful gift with those hands. I’ve come to a thankful place where I believe God uses that gift of touch. It was in his plan all along.  God will use those hands to touch lives.  Though those hands will not always find themselves in God’s will, I will commit them to God’s use-he's the one who designed them.

If you’re still reading, you are maybe thinking of someone you know who has faced rejection because they didn't look, act or perform similar to those around them. You probably love someone who has been diagnosed with a disorder. Along with disorders and distinct differences comes struggle, I understand this.  But diversity is divine.

The child with Cerebral palsy is not like the other children.  He is not even like the other children with Cerebral Palsy.

  He is the perfectly- woven- together creation of God; knitted in unique fashion.

If those around us are to see that all children are marvelously made, we need to believe it ourselves.  You have been called to be that parent.  You have been called to pray for that parent.

Let’s ask God to help us in our struggle, be thankful for our difference, and to truly see the beauty that was made in the secret place

 

Pictured above:  This is a picture I got to snap playing with some girls in an orphanage in Kenya-one of the BEST times of my life.

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A picture is worth a thousand words.  I've added a few....

Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden.

-Cory Ten Boom

A must read-

The Hiding Place by Cory Ten Boom

A Dutch Christian, she and her family hid many Jews and helped them escape during the Holocaust.  Her father as well as her sister died at concentration camps.  Cory often wondered why she was the survivor when she felt her father and sister were stronger in their faith.  Her testimony shows that God left Cory behind with a purpose.  Her words will touch you, leaving you longing for a closer walk with Jesus.  This is an unforgettable story of faith and forgiveness.

Pictured above: I took this picture from a puddle on our street in Trinity.  We were able to see the frog eggs hatch into tadpoles.

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Sweating is gross.  I don't do that.

-Words from Rylie when getting the kids from school Wednesday

 .  I wish it were that simple.  If only I could banish certain experiences and attitudes by deciding they were gross or undesirable.  I love her thinking.

Some things are just going to happen.  I'm going to sweat.  I'm going to have my occasional fails with my supper experiments.  I'm going to have bad hair days and the sinus infections will come and go.  No amount of determination and experience will rid me of these parts of life; I guess I can live with that.

Then there are those things I do-I choose to do, that I just can't seem to stop; that's a different story.  For instance, I choose to be grumpy.  Being sarcastic with my kids and Jason is a choice, I don't have to do that.  Watching unwholesome movies and shows on TV is a conscious decision, unlike sweating.  With each of these undesired behaviors I know, if not before, right when I'm doing it, that I shouldn't be doing it.  Why can't I stop?  Why do I even start?  I'm encouraged that Paul had the same problem.  Listen to him in Romans 7>

18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[c]   For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 

 25 Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!

We MUST come to a place daily, where we recognize that there is no good in us apart from God.  Try as we may, we are a resevoir and conduit of sin.  When we continue to try and free ourself from the clutches of sin we find our effort fruitless and frustrated. The- "If at first you don't succeed -try, try again" mentality is like banging your head against a brick wall (nothing is accomplished and you're left feeling damaged).

I think the problem may be that we focus too much on what WE can and can't do on our own effort.

We have a sinful nature, and we're going to, for the remainder of our time on this side of eternity.  Our hope, and any good that we can do comes only from Jesus.  His death on the cross was enough.  He said "it is finished".  He meant it. It's obviously good to try and refrain from wrongdoing. There is merit in trying to do good. But REMEMBER, trying to do good apart from a relationship with God is in vain.

 

Our effort must dissolve into a passion to know Christ more fully.  His grace covers our failures.  His goodness flows through our veins. 

 If we make Him our true focus, we have nothing to sweat.

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Families are one of God's most precious creations. While we ought to be honoring each God-designed member with love and respect, it's often our family members that see our worst side.  

Being free to be ourselves can sometimes get ugly.  Comfortable at home we often use our words carelessly.  Being in our castle, we find ourselves inclined to lose our patience with anyone who disturbs our peace or pleasure.  On the other end of the spectrum, our busyness prevents us from spending time together and enjoying one another. 

Hopefully you've gotten a chance to check out:

-the Family Contract

-and just for fun The Daughter of the Year Contract

 

Think about starting a Lovely List (pictured above) as a family project.  If the name isn't masculine enough, it could be called the Whatever List.  We have started one in our family.  It hangs on our refrigerator.  It's basically a lined piece of paper that has Philippians 4:8 on the bottom.

...whatever is true, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.-Philippians 4:8

If Jason or I or even the kids notice something right, lovely or admirable we write it on the list.  It could be something positive that happened at school.  Seeing a flower or a blue sky and being reminded of beauty in God's creation could be noted.  Take notice of Your son saying thank you to his sister.  Our perspective is changed a bit when we are looking for lovely things instead of things to argue about or tattle on.

OBVIOUSLY, contracts, lists or any other creative ploy to bring about harmony is useless without constant prayer on our families behalf- (I'm reminding myself).

 

*Please share things you are doing with your family.  I'd love to hear from you!

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FAMILY CONTRACT

 

As a God-designed member of this family, I agree to try to become a person:

Of Peace                     Of Gentleness

Of Patience                 Of kindness

Of Respect                  Of Obedience (parents-obedience to God)

Of Love

 

I will do my best to refrain from:

Tattling, arguing, fighting, yelling, pouting, ganging up, belittling and exasperating

 

We understand, as a family, that in order to fulfill these duties we must do our best to remember to:

Pray.                            Pray together.

Read and follow and God’s Word.

Listen to each other.

Forgive.

Put others before ourself.

Date:                               Signatures:

 

 

 

Last week I made up this contract for our family.  The contract was also handed out at our last GG's meeting.  Consider making one to fit your family.  After having dinner together as a family, we read over the contract, talked about it and said a prayer.  We put the contract in a frame so we can be reminded of our promise.

*There have been two ocassions where a family member has been called out for breaching the contract.  (It was me)!  The kids are taking it seriously!

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 Are you the perfect daughter?  Answer these questions honestly.  If you don't have, say a brother or sister, answer the brother/sister questions by answering how you think you would react.

 

When I’m asked to clean my room, I:

A.Ask if my brother has to clean his

B.Clean it halfway, stuffing things under the bed

C.They don’t have to ask, I keep it clean

D.I whine, then clean it

2When your mom asks you to change your shirt, you

A.Roll your eyes then change it

B.Ask why

C.Change your shirt immediately

D.Beg her to let you wear it

3Your sister tries to get you in trouble every day, you:

A.Finally decide not to talk to her anymore

B.Think about revenge

C.Pray first asking God’s help.  Then talk to your sister or mom about it.

D.Start telling on her for every little thing she does-see how she likes it

4You know your mom’s going to be upset because you made a really bad grade on your math paper, you:

A.Hide the paper

B.Remind her that grandma told you that your mom was really bad in math too

C.Tell her you’ll try to do better and mean it

D.Tell her how half the class did worse than you

5When your dad tells you to put the magazine away, you say:

A.It’s not a magazine

B.Ok. Just a minute.

C.Yes sir.

D.Why do I have to?  It’s not my bedtime.

6Your most common reaction to getting in trouble is to:

A.Roll your eyes

B.Sigh

C.Think to yourself my parents probably know what they’re doing

D.Pout

 

7Mom feels bad.  You :

A.Use the time she’s napping to steal away extra TV time

B.Fight with your brother

C.Try and think of something you can do to help

D.Wake her up because you can’t find a snack

8Your dad has wrongly accused you of leaving your shoes in the yard, you:

A.Tell your mom he’s being unfair

B.Argue

C.Remember that everybody makes mistakes.  Pick up the shoes. Then you tell him that your sister borrowed them and left them outside.

D.Get them. Throw them in your room and pout.

9The thing you do concerning your brother/sister most often:

A.Argue

B.Tattle

C.Pray for

D.Prank

Easy Score Scale:

All C’s-  You are the DAUGHTER OF THE YEAR!!!  I would love for you to come stay at my house for a week to tutor my kids.  But seriously, ALL C's?  Nobody's that good.

Not all C’s- You are like most precious daughters I know; you have room to improve.  Be thankful for your family.  Be forgiving.   Obey your parents even when you don’t agree.  Remember that arguing, eye-rolling, sighing, tattling and pouting are reactions that come easily and automatically.  Pray for God’s help when it is hard to be that loving sister or that respectful daughter that God has designed you to be.

Oh I wish I was there with you to see your answers.  Please let me know how you did!

One more thing!  -Don't forget to check out the Family Contract and Lovely List Family Project (to be posted soon)!! It will be under the QUIZZES AND QUESTIONS and DEVOTION POSTS categories.

 

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   Track season is just finishing up.  Track was not my favorite sport back in my school days, but in a small school everyone is encouraged to participate.  As an eighty-something pound seventh grader I was signed up to throw shot put and discus. The only logic I can see in my coach placing me in those events was that I couldn't jump. That left shot and disc and coaches like to make sure that all the name blanks are filled on event entry sheets.   I guess the coach always had the hope that my competition might get a sudden virus or that I might drop the shot-put on their toe rendering them unable to compete.

I also ran the two-mile, the mile, and the half mile. I can still feel the butterflies that took flight in my stomach as I positioned myself on the track. I can still hear the gun being fired signaling time for take off.    I. was. not.fast.   BUT, I had endurance.  I might have been called the Energizer Bunny if he had existed then.   I did pretty well considering how much I disliked it.  I guess I was running away from running.

I remember in practice, my coach gave me Velcro-bags to strap around my ankles. Maybe it was just on one occasion, but I thought getting to use the weight bags was the coolest.  The bags were full of pennies.  It provided weight around my ankles.  I was to run around the track once with the weight.  Then I was to take off the weight and run.  I remember running after taking off the weight.  It was amazing; almost difficult to keep my feet on the ground.  I was so light.  It felt like running had been made a thousand times easier.

I can’t imagine why coach let me use the ankle weight bags just that time or two.  I’m thankful though, as it provided the perfect example of the effect sin has.  It also showed the remedy. The lap I ran with the bags was treaterous.  About ten yards into my run, I was hurting and exhausted.  The weight not only pulled at my ankles, but my whole body wanted to dissolve into a puddle much like the witch in Oz who was doused with water.  Similarly, sin weighs us down.  I tend to lose things fairly often, but I keep an excellent record of my sin.  My own sin, combined with the sin around me is just too much to bear.  I told Hallie I would make her lunch, but I forgot.  I was sarcastic with Hayden again.  Where was my patience with Rylie?  I am so discouraged by injustice in the world; sin.  Heavily weighted by sin in my own heart, and sin all around me-  I don’t know if I’m being consumed from the inside-out or the outside-in.

Thankfully, Paul has a pertintent word.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us.

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus…..-Hebrews 12:1,2

Being weighed down in sin is actually a blessing.  I never felt so light, so able to run the race set before me until the weight was unbearable and then removed.  The weight of sin was bore on calvary.  We can add as much weight as we want to our running bags, trying to do life on our own strength.  And we can run much more than a lap if we so desire. But it is when we throw off the weight, casting it to the cross, that we are able to really run the race.  Running with perserverance means that we have to be persistent, steadfast.  We must constantly “cast off”.

Daily life is both practice and the real race.  We have cheering fans in the stand, the men and women mentioned in Hebrews and Christian brothers and sisters with us now.  They are urging us to run unburdened and unhindered.  Weightless, by faith that Jesus has endured it all, let us run.  Let us run before those cheering witnesses with our eyes on Jesus, who is both with us and waiting for us at the finish line.