Dear Teenage Daughter, 

You finally got an iPhone. I'm pretty sure you knew it was coming. Your youth leader openly teased you about your blackberry (without the smart) phone. He did it in front of us in effort to let us know we should upgrade. 

Then there's that time at the beginning of this school year that your teacher announced you would be using your smart phone.  She asked the class by show of hands who had one. You were the only one with your hand down. 

Plus you've become increasingly engaged in social events this year like after school theater practice and youth events and need a dependable phone. And you just turned fifteen. 

So we got you one. We're not monsters. 

  

Tuesday when you opened your birthday gifts, you opened your phone case first. The cat was out of the bag. You opened the other gifts quickly and purposefully. 

Immediately I sent you some emojis to make up for times in the past that I tried to send you an emoji and it showed up on your phone as some weird intelligible character that reminded you that you weren't a part of the "Emoji Club". I'm sorry for those times I made you feel you didn't belong in the phone world. 

  

But now I'm a good mom and your dad's a good dad. 

We'll sort of. 

It's three days past your birthday and I have a confession to make. I was hoping to share it with you at a later date, but since you haven't answered your texts in a timely manner today, it's best to go ahead and tell you. 

Your smart phone isn't just for you. Really, it's for your dad and me. 

Your phone is useful to us because it serves as a tracking device, much like someone with an ankle bracelet on probation. So keep up with it.  It helps us to know your whereabouts. (Stalking apps don't work on blackberries without smart-like capabilities. )

An hour ago we knew that your college-age brother had just left his dorm in Huntsville -before he let us know...Because we stalk him on a parent friendly app called "Find  Iphone". 

Helpful hint though. We can't stalk you if your phone is off. And if your phone is turned off we immediately think that you're engaging in bad behavior and don't want us to know your whereabouts; kind of like when your little sister used to hide behind the couch when she'd heisted chocolate. 

If you don't return a text promptly, or if your phone is turned off, the next thing we think is that you're dead,or possibly kidnapped. 

See?

  

I realize you're at a theater contest right now.  I understand they probably have you turn your phone off too, being that they don't want performances interrupted. I get it. But rational thoughts such as these only come after the thoughts I previously mentioned -

1. You going rogue 

2. You having been abducted or your untimely demise  

Tell me something. Wasn't checking to see if you had any texts from me the first thing on your mind at lunch break? 

We hope your iPhone will bring you much joy. You have a built-in friend/navigator in Siri and can now take screenshots all you want. I love screenshots. 

But besides all the fun that comes with your new phone, know that it's a tool that will aid in your safety and our peace of mind (Occasionally it will aid in our meddling, but only the good kind that good parents do even when they have good kids). 

  
We'll talk about this when you get home from Tyler tonight, but who knows, since you have a smart phone, you may know about it before you get here. 

Love, 

Mom