2 Corinthians 9:8

And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

I remember a childhood challenge I was given by my dad upon losing my first tooth. "Your new 'big' tooth will come in gold if you can keep from sticking your tongue in the hole where you just lost that baby tooth". I took the challenge perfectly serious every time I lost a tooth and did my darnedest to keep my tongue away from the gap between my teeth. It was easy initially, as my resolve was newfangled like the hole that had just sprung up in my mouth. 

I lost a mouthful of baby teeth over the years and gained a whole new set of permanent choppers, but not one of them are gold.  Not for the lack of trying, but I never quite met the challenge my father gave me. If there's anybody out there with a natural golden tooth, we need to talk. 

Funny. My white teeth are a sort of reminder of a challenge (tried many times) in which I failed. But I guess that turned out ok. 

I don't remember facing many difficult challenges as a child. By the time I became a teenager, I remember paying a little more attention to expectations around me. I tried out for cheerleader in junior high school for no other reason than a teacher told me I should and I didn't want to disappoint her. 

  

I despised putting my arrhythmic self in front of a crowd of people. I don't even like standing in front of people, but for three years I yelled through a megaphone at them. 
Ironically, I'm still in front of the crowd in adulthood, dutifully performing. 

I've outgrown my gold and white pleated skirt and puff sleeve sweater and my megaphone has been put down. I now face the challenge of motherhood with an onslaught of onlookers whose approval matters more than it should. 

I, like many of you, want happy and healthy families who gravitate toward loving Jesus better. 

It's a challenge many of us feel we're not meeting, though we're dogged tired from trying. Many of us are distracted from our idea of happy and healthy by a hoard of other voices.  They tell us their version of success is key to ours. The crowd before "us moms" holds a megaphone, and through it, "do's and don'ts" are shouted as we try our best to support our families. 

Do breast feed. Dont co-sleep. Do fix yourself up. Don't let your kids watch TV. Do vaccinate. Don't let your kids spend the night with friends. Eat non-GMO only. Don't read the "Jesus Calling" devotional to your children. Do work out. Don't drink soda, it's worse than marijuana. Do spank. Don't look at Facebook when you're eating out with you're family (because if you do I'll take your picture and post it, making you seem like a negligent parent in the world of social media). 

This week I saw a terrible meme bearing a picture of an overweight child with the caption 

"If you allow your child to be overweight, that's child abuse". 

I cringed. The original poster boasted that he wasn't a parent but knew with certainty that obesity is an impossibility in children whose parents care about their health. This "Don't let your kid be fat" post has been shared and liked numerous times. Commenters emotionally tried to explain how they have a child who they've made sure followed a healthy diet and got proper exercise to no avail. 

"Guy who doesn't have kids but knows how to keep them slender" is one example of a well-meaning adviser who doesn't serve us well. 

Happy, healthy and holy are unreachable for many of us because the definition of the three comes from a wide range of so-called experts who suggest one-size-fits-all. 

There's room for advice, but we must seek it wisely. 

We need to be more choosy in what part of the crowd we tune our ear to. Learning to drown out the voices that don't cheer us on is key to contentment, and a mama's contentment is an important factor in the mood of families. 

We have to learn to spend time away from the crowd with trusted friends. The best friends have more encouragement to offer than they do answers. They'll pray for you instead of thinking your challenge would be resolved if you'd only adopt their way of thinking. 

We'll never parent perfectly. Spend time alone with God receiving the grace that He grants alongside unmet challenges. Sustaining grace helps us meet the pressures we face tomorrow. And grace will never shout out the answer, rather it is the answer. 

 Grace is the gold in the gap.