Tag Archives: kristi burden

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God wants your mess.

Your sticky mess.

The mess you unwittingly find yourself in

and the messes you create; when you've followed a recipe for disaster

God wants your mess

The small mess

 the mess you find yourself covered in

and your mess that lands in the lap of others.

No need to try and hide it.

Didn't you know?

God's in the cleaning business.

He longs for your invitation; when you quit wiggling and squirming, trying to avoid being wiped clean.

He's waiting for you to be finished in your ill attempt at doing your own clean up.

In the most loving of voices he urges, "Hand it over.".

Create in me a clean heart, O God, Renew a loyal spirit within me. -Psalm 51:10

I'd love to chat with you or pray for you kristiburden@gmail.com

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Another God's Girlies Event:

Geared toward girls in first through seventh

Bring your mom, an aunt or grandma

Invite a friend 

Or invite someone you hardly know and make a friend.

Girls in grades fifth through seventh will spend special time with mentors.  If you haven't been assigned one, that's ok. 

Come and we'll fix you up.

Sunday, October 28

3:30-5:00

Edu 102

Come learn how you're one of God's prized pumpkins in his world-sized patch.  Learn how he cleans us up and decorates us giving us a "new face".  You'll be reminded that he puts his light inside us so that we can glow for Him.

We'll also make a fun pumpkin craft and have time for prayer.

You don't want to miss it.

Register on Facebook; a head count will greatly help.

(An event has been created on the God's Girlies page)

Send me an email with any questions kristiburden@gmail.com

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I'm doing lots of walking down memory lane this month. If only that kind of walking burned calories. Alas, I don't think it works that way, especially when your eating chocolate chip cookies (for breakfast) while you're walking down memory lane.

Back to the point.

Hayden will turn sixteen in seventeen days.  I am filled with emotion.

I'm excited for him; sixteen's a big one.  He'll be licensed to drive.  Turning sixteen is a sign that greater independence is at the threshold.

I'm also scared silly.  He's won't be entirely experienced when he gets behind the wheel (alone) There are other drivers out there with too much on their minds; drivers in a hurry.  Does driving signal that it's time for dating?

How did this happen so fast?

We got a scanner recently which prompted me to go through old pictures. I've been looking at pictures of Hayden with his chunky baby legs.  I've held pictures and laughed at his common expression around the age of two; the one where his fists are balled and his teeth are clenched and he's saying "cheese" to the whole world. It's almost more than I can bear to think those days are gone.

My "memory trip " reminded me of one of the stories I used to tell about Hayden.

Before the girls, when it was just Jason, Hayden and I,  our first pastorate was in Chilton.  I remember one Sunday Hayden had been especially "expressive" in Children's Church ( and by Children's church, I mean the mini lesson that was given on the podium-for the world to see). Despite the harmful rays projected from my evil eyes, Hayden continued to talk, and wiggle, and.... flip.

He and I were walking home to the parsonage after church.  I remember gripping his hand quite tightly in effort to show the seriousness of the situation.  I sneered, "We need to have a talk when we get home!". Hayden's little feet scrambled to keep up as he said, "Can we pray first?".

I love that story. It's a story that warrants an eye- roll as I've told it a hundred times.  But for some reason my current recollection has brought about new thoughts.

Hayden was a mess that Sunday, no doubt.  But as I look back at my reaction, it's me who has the greater lesson to learn.  I can't remember if we prayed first or not; I'm guessing we did not.

Should we have prayed first?  Should I be doing more praying now instead of reducing myself to a tearful, anxious mess of a woman?

I'm certain I'm going to be doing some worrying and that there will be some misty-eyed moments in the weeks to come.

Driving.

Grades.

Girls.

College.

Job.

Evils of the world.

Marriage.

Oh what am I saying, ......in the years to come.

It's time to loosen my grip and

Even my tone

But I'd do best to take advice from a chubby cheeked boy and

"pray first".

Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything.  Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Philippians 4:6

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I have a love/hate relationship with my computer; mostly hate.


I've become more aware of my computer's diabolical nature over the course of time.  This ludicrous laptop finds joy in pushing MY buttons (Hey, that's my job).  Still, as life's hardships are the best teachers, many life-important lessons have been reinforced through my connection with my computer.

Things I've Learned from my Computer

It is more by our own paranoia that we are soul injured than by the intentions of others.  The computer, and people in general typically do not set out to hurt or frustrate us.

Patience is a virtue.

The computer, like us, will hold on to meaningless information and "lose" vital messages to the great abyss.

When the computer is working slowly, purpose is not necessarily reduced.  Great purpose is often achieved in simply being forced to  slow down.

Save what's important.

There is " a time to weep and a time to laugh". We treasure touching stories and priceless pictures with which we're face to face.  Thank your computer screen for graciously sharing.

With Google we learn" there's a time to search and a time to give up" (though the "time to give up signal" is often ignored followed by another hour of searching).

Like most tools, the computer can be used to build or tear down.  The choice is in the hands of the one who works the tool.

Nearness can be achieved by means other than physical geography.

It's foolish to expect all response to be immediate.

With computers and humans, sometimes no response IS the response.  Accept it. Thank goodness this isn't so with God.

Not all information is necessary.

Not all information is edifying.

Overload will inevitably cause a "slow down" if not a crash.

No matter how hard you push buttons, if it's not working, it's not working.

Sometimes you need to walk away.

The same rule applies to the amount of TIMES you push the buttons. If it's not working, learn to walk away at least for a spell.

Being able to minimize and maximize what's on your screen is necessary.

Your computer can't hear your hisses, groans and urges to "Hurry!"; it only hears the old fingers tapping. If you're not talking in the right manner, you probably won't be heard.  At best you'll be misinterpreted.

And maybe the best lesson?

My frenemy (friend + enemy), the internet, in its limitless bounds taught me this one.

Have purpose,   as distraction will surely invite you on its way.

 

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Sounds of cheering fans at Friday night football games have signaled Fall's arrival.

The festive "Boo" pillow nestled in my favorite chair and the grapevine pumpkins on the end table greet.

 Fall is here. 

I grab my annual bags of candy corn on my Target run.

These simple joys are here in honor of autumn.

My favorite time of year is here again.

These decorations rich in color remind me of those anticipated glorious leaves; the gorgeous reds and golds that dangle and dance. 

I long for the leaves that make their descent  finding themselves sandwiched between the sidewalk and my moving feet.  The "crunch" sound is literally music to my ears. 

The only thing I don't love about Fall is how the light fades earlier and earlier with each coming day.  By six o'clock darkness has swallowed the day.

Though darkness is seldom welcomed, I'd be remiss in forgetting that its the increasing darkness that transforms the leaves on bushes and trees. It's in dimness that the faded green hues change into bold brightness.

As fall is ushered in, it seems the world around is on fire.

It's a beauty to behold. 

 While I wait for the revealing of leaves with vivid color, it's worth remembering that

even  beauty hidden from my eyes,

remains deep within me.

 

 Reflect the beauty.

I'd love to hear from you kristiburden@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

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I am uber-excited (never used the word "uber' before but wanted to show you I'm BEYOND excited) about our Sunday gathering.  Make plans to attend  "Dear Me" if at all possible. 

 I know of several sweet girls and moms who won't be able to make it because of  previously planned engagements.  There are also others of you on the other side of the screen who won't be able to attend like our friend Olivia in Florida and other friends and moms I've never met.  So.... I'm including our activities here on the website JUST FOR YOU. 

 

 To My Pre-Teen Friend 

http://kristiburden.com/?p=3335

This is a devotion that reminds our young girls that today isn't everything.  And we have hopes for a future that seems light years away.  They will be encouraged to share the things of "today" that bring worry, frustration and those things that can be all-consuming like "What shoes should I wear with this?".  They will learn that those things of today and the uncertainties and hopes of tomorrow are in the hands of the one who holds time and each one of us.

 

 

Dear Me in May

http://kristiburden.com/?p=3339e

The girls will fill in the blanks on a form  letter stating what some of their favorite things are and "what makes them so mad"....  The front side represents "who I am today" while the back side of the letter is reserved for tomorrow's hopes and a prayer.  The girls will be decorating time capsules in which these letters will be placed.  Each mom is also asked to write a letter to her daughter expressing what her hope and prayer is for her daughter in the next eight months.  The time capsules will be decorated in craft time, then tucked away until we have our May party.  I'll add pictures of the time capsules to the website soon.

Another Step in the Journey

http://kristiburden.com/?p=3411

This portion of our gathering will be done in small groups.  For our older girls fifth and up, this is a time to meet with their mentor.  This sheet has our focal verses Psalm 31:14-15.  This is a time to discuss the meaning of the verse in the context of our lives.  There is also an "at home" section with suggestions on how to make your own time capsule at home.

 

 

 

 

Hoping that girls near and far will participate in this fun event.  I would be beside myself if you came back and commented and told me about it. Or......if you sent me a picture...I might do a cartwheel.  Well maybe a front rollover.

Here's a link of gathering info. (time, place...) http://kristiburden.com/?p=3198

I'd love to hear from you kristiburden@gmail.com

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Dear Me at 37,

Last week you traveled back in time; back to 1989 when you were just fourteen. And you wrote a letter to yourself back then. It was so important that you look back and see where you were.  You needed to look upon that fresh face, full of hope that upon trying, she would reach that point where life is all roses.

You reminisced a time when an affirming word made you feel whole.  You looked back to a time when completing a level on Mario Bros. made for a good day. Hearing She Drives Me Crazy or anything by Phil Collins was all it took to lift your spirits. But just as quick your day was made, one wrong look from someone in the hallway at school and your joy was stolen.

So flighty.

So insecure.

So petty.

So small.

This is going to hurt a little, but I must ask you.  Have you really changed that much?  Sure you smile and engage in conversation like you're Mrs. Congeniality.  You could now play Monopoly with your brother and sister-n-law  without a fight breaking out over how much money is owed by landing on Park Place. But are you where you want to be?

You know deep down that the smile on your face is an offering that comes when you're elated and when you're crushed. You still spend too much time being the latter. You don't play board games or video games anymore, all your time is spent in this game called life. You still come unleashed on the inside when you feel you're losing or if other people don't play fair.

You looked back for a reason; there was something to be learned. It's true what God's word says: "Everything that was written in the past was written to teach us."

Looking back helped you to learn from those mistakes; the ones you made in  High School and the one you made after supper last night.

You know, there are two ways to look at your mistakes.  You can count every tear and loss.  You can count every bad day and every failure.  The number of times you've shrunken in terror would be too many to list.  So many things go wrong.

But I need you to hear this.  It's not so much about how many mistakes you've made.  Really you've only made one.

You forget your first love.

You make this mistake over and over.

You pray, but then somehow forget that your amen doesn't have to end the interaction. Then you go and do, without remembering or asking what He thinks.

You read those precious promises that God is your refuge and then go off feeling helpless, vulnerable and alone.

You base your day on your successes or how someone else makes you feel instead of relying on the unchanging nature of God.

This BIG mistake, the one where you forget your first love? It's a part of your DNA.  It's what makes you human.

Get over it.

Stop focusing on all that goes wrong.  Instead, pay attention to all the beautiful things that come from your first love, like that rainstorm the other day-the one where you got listen to the thunder roll and it made your heart swell.

Quit thinking about what doesn't go your way and remember that God smiles at you every day through sunshine and the toothy smile of your seven-year old. He tells you that everything is ok through the reassuring words of your husband.  Sometimes He whispers assurance straight to your heart.

So what if you still disappoint- like the time this week when you accidentally took Rylie's completed homework out of her folder and she had to sit out of the whole recess for not having it.  Your first love is with you in your disappointment. He was with Rylie too. He wishes you would know that in the scheme of things, it's not such a big deal.  She forgave you without hesitation.

Your days are filled with hugs and affirmation from your boy and the chance to revel at the creativity and strength of that middle daughter of yours.  There's music to be heard even when your favorite radio station doesn't come in. A chorus of birds waits outside your kitchen window most every morning. You're never alone.

Hey you in the mirror.

Look at your self- back then and now, but not for too long.

It's spending too much time in the mirror that our imperfection begins to define us.

Own us.

Go on and glance in the mirror, but keep looking to your first love.

Just in case you missed my Letter at 14: http://kristiburden.com/?p=2993
 Or say hello @ kristiburden@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Confession #1,072- I am a control freak.

It's simple.  I like things like I like them.  And even when I don't like things, like speaking in front of people and cabbage, I WILL myself, in my controlling nature, to deal with those things.

It's the unknown that unhinges me.

I couldn't sleep last night.

The week ahead is a busy one.  Amongst the busy, I agreed to do something I haven't done before.  I will be in unfamiliar territory.  I won't have my specific orders until I get there. I won't know where the bathroom is for goodness sake, or how I will be received.

I'm a dot-to-dot girl; not a blank page to be freely doodled on or a word search.  No puzzles. I like the confidence that comes with quickly knowing what is taking shape; like on on a dot-to-dot.  I want to see and know what lies ahead.

I pay no heed to the spoiler alert for movies.  I want the spoiler.  If the guy and the girl don't get together, I want to prepare myself.  If the main character dies, I want to know- so I can opt out of watching the movie, or the ending.

I am in control.

Being in control seems like a safe place to be, but nothing could be farther from the truth.

Outside the boundaries of that safe place lies frenzied fear.

Will I be able to handle this new situation?

When I go to Kenya, will I be able to come back home safely to my children?

If I make a desert besides chocolate chip cookies (pretty much the only dessert I've made since I was 12 and could make with my eyes closed) will it turn out?  That French Toast I tried twice didn't turn out.

Will I get cancer?

Will my kids want to be close to me and their dad when they're grown?

So I stay in my fist-sized comfort zone.

And I eat my chocolate chip cookies while watching a movie I've guilted Hallie into watching with me.  I may even google headaches and ear ringing (something I need to know about) while we're watching the movie because I already know what is going to happen in the movie.  I've watched it three times before.  I like knowing what's going to happen.

In spite of all the things I have control of, which I truly understand is very little, life is uncertain.

Life is unpredictable.

We are surrounded by unknown.

Paul is not my favorite character of the Bible.  He shames me every time.   In Acts 17, the people of Athens were giving all of their attention TO AN UNKNOWN GOD.

I sacrifice my time, my energy and my focus to the UNKNOWN. I give it my fear.

Paul speaks right to me as he tells the Athenians that God's plan is one in which we would seek HIM.

......so that men would seek him

and perhaps reach out and find him,

though he is not far from each one of us.

  For in him we live and move and have our being.

-Acts 17:27,28

He is in control.

Receive the unknown.  He is in it.

You can try and seize the day, but God's already got it.

What are you gripping, that needs to be given to God?

I'd love to hear from you- kristiburden@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

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DEAR ME

Kristi,

There you are.  I'd recognize you anywhere with your hair as big as your dreams and that shy smile.  You made it through Junior High.  Well done.

You're about to transfer to a bigger school.  You'll be terrified, often forgetting that God who parted the water, the one who walked on water is right beside you.

You'll meet your biggest enemy while at High School.

Oh, don't act so surprised.  You already know her.....IT'S YOU!!!

There will be other people who don't accept you for who you are.  You'll try to figure out how to make sure that everyone likes you..... and you'll fail.

Your Freshman year, you will have to deal with boys who in their insecurity are degrading.  Your dad will go nuts when one of them writes something filthy in the dust on your car.  Amazingly you'll wonder what is wrong with you.

Making friends will take time, but you'll get there.

Algebra will eat your lunch.  It will be the first "C" you get, but it won't be your last.  You will learn your Freshman year that things don't always come easy, despite your best effort.  You'll end up having to have grace when Hayden (who will become your son) has trouble with Math.

Throughout High School you'll be nice to everybody, but your kindness will be more about "fitting in". You'll want the attention of the popular crowd.  Sometimes you'll get it.  And you'll feel as high as a kite......for that day.

You'll learn that "fitting in" isn't all it's cracked up to be, although you will have an addiction to popularity- much like the one you'll have for Dr. Pepper when you become an adult.

Try to be a friend to everyone.

Try not to pay too much attention to whether or not your friendly efforts are appreciated or reciprocated.

Be kind.  Period.

You know, you're pretty good when it comes to running long distances.  I know you're really proud of your running times in the mile and two-mile back in sixth grade.  I love it that your Mom had medals  made for you because it didn't seem they were giving ribbons. (She'll always be your silent cheerleader).  You raced against the boys in the two-mile and beat most of them.....yes, I remember.

So you should be surprised to know that you'll drop out of all sports by the time you're a sophomore.  Winning, or maybe the fear of losing will become more important than improving yourself.

Fear will be your constant companion. You'll be elected Homecoming Queen Nominee, but you won't enjoy a minute of it.  You'll be too worried about losing to your friend, the other nominee, in front of all of those people.

You will have some great teachers.  Some of them will have different beliefs than you and they'll challenge your beliefs. And you'll better know what your beliefs are because of it. Mr. Flowers will tell you that you're tightly wound.  Listen to him, he's trying to tell you to chill out a little.

Coach Harris will be your favorite teacher.  He'll compliment your handwriting just because he knows you need encouragement.  When you go to the Junior prom alone, he'll tell you that the boys are crazy for not asking you to be their date.

It will end up being one of the best nights even though you'll go to Red Lobster in your prom dress with your mom and dad, and your dad will fish for compliments from the waiter for you.

There will be successes you don't expect.  You'll be a class officer all four years, class president your Junior and Senior year.  You'll be president of the Spanish Club too.  You'll be in the National Honor Society and a part of a Peer Assistant Leadership group.  You'll be asked to lead prayer at your graduation ceremony.

You'll be miles outside of your comfort zone, but that will just mean that you're growing.

Parts of your High School time sound pretty dismal right?  I've purposely brought those up.  So many of those difficult times you'll go through will shape who you will become.

You'll learn through heartache and rejection to cherish those who love you as you are.  Your best friend will die in a car wreck. You'll be devastated, but you're going to be alright. You can't change things. Don't take time, or your loved ones for granted.  Hug your mom and dad. Trust them.  Tell your sisters and your brother that you love them.  That way it won't seem so weird saying it when you're older.

Pray more.

You'll look back and wish that you hadn't seen everything that didn't go your way as a failure.

You'll learn that winning isn't everything and losing isn't either.  By the way, you'll have a daughter who refuses to play games even at a baby shower.  She'll hate to lose too.  Good luck with that.

Believe it or not, you'll end up living in the same town with one of your old friends 350 miles from home.  You'll talk with her for hours telling her how wish you had handled this thing called "friendship" better.  Don't be too hard on yourself.

I won't tell you who you end up marrying, but I will say this.  You'll meet him SOON. Your life will be better than those dreams the size of your hair. You'll have three kids that will listen to you about as good as you listened to your mom and dad.  But you'll still think they're the closest thing to perfect.

God's plan is going to knock your socks off!

In the meantime, I'll give you some advice I heard from a ten-year old.

Learn to learn.

A secret?  This ten-year old is your future daughter.

Life with its fleeting miseries, simple pleasures and small victories is glorious my dear-Embrace it!

 

I'd love to hear from you in comments or email kristiburden@gmail.com

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The dew drops collect

and willingly the clouds receive them.

The clouds grow with outstretched arms

Like worries they build.

Their billowing beauty is seen from a distance

but the clouds are unaware.

Swelling under the weight

the clouds let go

and the rain falls.

It hushes the thirsty land.

Now weightless, free, the clouds

look down at beauty and growth promised.

They look up thankful, smiling at having purpose.

He covers the heavens with clouds, provides rain for the earth, and makes the grass grow in mountain pastures.

-Psalm 147:8