Dear Me and Other Parents running around trying to prepare yourselves for a great school year,

It's that time again.  The school year seems to wind around about as quickly as the long arm on the clock.  You're never quite ready for the new year to begin.  You're making that mental list of the things you planned to do over the summer that didn't happen.  And you're scrambling making sure that the kids have new socks and jeans, and the right kind of binder so they won't (and you won't) appear to be less than serious about their education.  This year is no different from the rest.

But I do want to write to you, urging you to remember some things this school year.  August, like January is a month full of good intentions.  Those well-planned, smooth and seamless days will last about as long as the lunch money check you send.

You might as well drop your perfect school year dream.

There will be times when Hallie forgets her homework at school.  Having consequences, especially if it becomes a habit, is fine, but don't worry about it too much. Don't freak out and don't let her freak out either. Her figuring out how to approach the situation will help her develop her problem-solving skills.

Hayden is more than likely going to take a test that he isn't prepared for.  Asking him every day if he has a test the next day is ineffective.  By the twenty-eighth time you've asked him, He's thinking that you sound like the teacher on Charlie Brown (wah wah wah-wah...) if he hears you at all.  He's not once in the past responded to your question with "Hey Mom, glad you said something.  I do have a History exam.  I think I'll go study for it right now." Maybe have some expectation that he's aware of.  Let him reach those expectations, or not. Go from there. Sheesh!

RYLIE IS GOING TO TALK IN CLASS.  You know that, right?  It's in her nature.  It's not a bad thing.  She's done pretty good the past two school years not getting into much trouble for it.  Remember that her disrespecting the teacher or being unkind to someone is more to be upset about than her being chatty.

You're going to forget to sign her homework folder several times regardless of any "system" you set up to check her folder.  Be gracious with yourself just as you are going to be gracious when she slips up and chats during class.  If her not having her folder signed ruins her day, you've probably missed teaching her that we have imperfect days, and that it's ok.

Stay off that Home Access grading system.  Or at least limit yourself for goodness sake. There's no need to check it like you do, willing good grades to appear, thinking that if you check it enough, new grades will pop up. It's not that helpful how you use it.  You pick up the kids all nonchalant, and then in two minutes the afternoon mood has been ruined having been turned into a lengthy lecture on responsibility and self-discipline just because you spotted a bad grade .

Make the kids ease up on TV.  They watch it too much.  And you've already missed having them seven hours of the day.

Don't make such a big deal when Hallie's ponytail is messy-looking (Need I pull out old pictures of your hair?).  It sure shouldn't EVER be the last thing you say to her before dropping her off in the morning.

Do try to keep a bedtime.  They need their rest.  So many times that's when you finally recognize that you let the afternoon pass without spending any time with them. Make time for them before 8:30 at night.

I know you're praying that they have good healthy friendships.  Keep praying that.

Pray for their teachers too.  Pray that they will see the good in each of your kids and that they will encourage them, love them and grow them (even when it might be a little painful).

When (if) you have a teacher that does something incredibly insensitive, or unfair, and it infuriates you, don't let the kids know.  They can know that you feel that they were treated wrongly without coming unraveled.  You've done that before.  Remember, a certain coach yelled something terrible to one of your kids and you lost it in the car. Rylie ended up, though she was only four, asking you to chant with her "Let's ruin Coach's Life".  Surely there's a better way to let your kid know that you don't like what happened to them.

Let the kids know you appreciate their teachers. Maybe it will help them appreciate them too.

Take them lunch every once in a blue moon.

Tell them what they're doing right every now and then.

Go to a movie on a Tuesday.

Help them with their homework when they need it.

Have cookies waiting at home for them when they get out of school.

Don't put all the emphasis on grades.

Have a sound idea of what they're capable of.

Have an open honest relationship with their teachers.

It's ok to get them from school a few times when they say they're sick, but they're really not.

It's also ok to tell them to tough it out a few times too.

But above all, keep in mind how quickly the school year passes and another year's gone.

Encourage them

when it seems nothing is going their way

Enjoy them

When their grades are not up to your standards.

Enjoy them

When they come home in a rotten mood.

If you forget everything else I've said, remember this

If you'll replace even a quarter of the time you do worrying and lecturing, with praying for them, it's going to be a great year.

Enjoy it.

Enjoy them.

School years won't last forever.  Make memories and foster growth that will.