Tag Archives: gods girlies

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I've diagnosed myself with claustrophobia.

I've also loosely diagnosed myself with agoraphobia, fear of open spaces.

I have a fear of having no escape, being trapped like a caged bird.  Oddly though, the thought of my cage door being wide open providing me freedom scares me too.  Who knows what's "out there".  When I think about such things my imagination runs wild.

This is a New Year post.  Wait for it....

While we were all at the table eating the other day, Jason asks the year-end question.  What have you guys resolved to do next year?  What a big question. That's an open space kind of question. There are hundreds of things I'm resolved to do; hundreds of things I am resolved NOT to do.  In spite of my resolutions, I'm pretty sure I will still be drinking more than a healthy share of Dr. Peppers come 2014.  Sadly, I also know that I'll lose it with my kids and Jason despite my annual ambition to be a person of gentleness and self-control.

No, thinking about resolutions and knowing with certainty that I will fail is futile.

Twelve months of being resolved to do anything is intimidating.

2013-What will I do with this open space?

I don't know what is out there.

And then again, I do know what's out there.

This might make you think I'm a "fly by the seat of my pants" kind of girl; one who lives for the moment.  That's not true either.  I have stood in the candy bar aisle frozen in indecision.  Should I have a Reeses or a Watchamacallit?  I often think that my decision to let one of the kids spend the night with a friend can alter the course of the earth.  What if something bad happens.  I live in terror in my closed spaces.  Will forgetting to hug Hallie this morning be followed by a day of her feeling alone and unloved?  In twenty years from now, will she think I was an absent mom?  It's as if every small decision made, holds failure or success, life and death significance.

I think too hard already.  I don't need to make resolutions.

In fact, I'm resolving not to make them.

I'm also determined to lighten up when it comes to decision-making and its effects.

In 2013  I don't want to be that bird in a cage, being suffocated by the imagined weight of my small decisions.  And I don't want to be the bird flying free, faced with the great unknown, and known future.

I want to recognize my place in the palm of the one who holds time and space.  I want to be with Him in the here and now, and the beyond.  I want to be close enough that I can hear him whispering words of grace and assurance in my bad decisions.  I want to be close enough that twelve months of open space don't seem dangerous; close enough that I am being......

 recreated by His resolve .

He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. Psalm 90:14

It's He who is faithful.

What about you?  -Have a resolution?

 

 

 

 

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In honor of my birthday, a friend gifted me with these pictures; treasures from the past.

This got me to thinking about Hallie and our image battles.  I care what she wears.  Hair can be signature too.  These pictures give great perspective.

This is what I'm thinking:

Here's confirmation that it's ok to say, "You're not going out with your hair looking like that".

Proof in picture that I'm needed in Hallie and Rylie's wardrobe selection

Yes I know, I have no pride.....

What MY MOM is thinking:

This is confirmation that eventually they WILL go out with their hair looking like that

Here's proof in picture that they will largely ignore your wardrobe aid

What doesn't kill your social status makes you stronger.

What is it my dad says?  Choose your battles.

 

 

 

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I decided to clean out my closet today.  Bad idea.  Before I knew it, my house blinders were off. And I was on a cleaning rampage.

/ If you don't know what house blinders are, they're the lens of choice for the months I don't have time to deep clean./

  When I wear them I can't see the dust on the baseboards or the ceiling fan, or any dust in-between for that matter.  I'm blind to the laundry basket full of unmatched socks, pillow cases without place and the pair of shorts Hayden's been looking for.

I'm perfectly content with the house when I'm wearing those blinders; and with the people in it.  But let me tell you, when the blinders come off it gets ugly.  I turn into a raving lunatic calling the place a pigsty.  I wonder out(very) loud how the house got in such a condition.

I start using phrases like "Is there nobody in this house who can throw an empty toilet paper tube in the trash?".  Every other word is "Really?".  The kids hide in their rooms at which point I comment on how I'm the only one "who ever does anything around this house".

I know......I am honestly ashamed and wouldn't be bringing it up except for the fact that there was something lovely surrounding my haggard behavior.

It was my family.

Like my disheveled closet I was a mess that couldn't be ignored.  So they suffered my tantrum and they helped me clean.  And then they did something I need to do more often.

They put THEIR blinders back on.  They looked at me as if I hadn't sprouted horns just moments before.  They hugged me without reservation. They hadn't forgotten my ill behavior, but they decided to see me through love lenses.

I think that's what grace is.

My cupcake runnneth over.

There's nothing sweeter.

 

 

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I haven't tried or wanted to try to write anything regarding the tragedy in Connecticut.  It's something I can't wrap my mind around.  I don't understand. 
 
Christmas, in my mind ,is the time of year to feel warm and fuzzy like the images on Norman Rockwell cards.  It's time for sweet surprises like the old coffee commercial where the troop comes home and surprises his mom showing up in her kitchen one morning in his army fatigues; home for Christmas.  But we're not home really.
 
That revelation has again become real, time and time again lately.  The world in all it's beauty, is a broken place where death stings.  Some families won't be together.  Bad news covers the TV screen while others struggle with private pain.
 
Darkness doesn't belong in Christmas. 
 
 Or is Christmas when darkness turns to dawn?
 
 As long as we live on this temporary globe, there will be darkness.  Some of us feel swallowed by it now.  But Christmas is HOPE.  Christmas is the message, in a babe, that light has come.  That light came to be with us and is with us still. 
 
Even more, that light which is Christ, shows us the way to a place and time where there will be no darkness; our future home.
 
HOPE
 
It's the gift given to us which we hold most tight to when things around us are more than we can bear.
24 For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? 25 But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
Romans 8:24-25
You probably know the song "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day".  With my short attention span I'm a first verse girl.  I'm tuned out for any verse beyond.  The other day I really listened to this whole song.  It's our story; a story about sweet Christmastime.  It's about despair often felt during the season.  But we can't miss the last verse.  It's about hope.  Listen for the bells ringing deep within our soul, soothing us with hope of a better day.
 
I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
 
 
I heard the bells on Christmas day, ther old familiar carols play, and mild and sweet their songs repeat, of peace on earth goodwill to men
And the bells are ringing (peace on earth)
Like a choir they're singing (peace on earth)
In my heart I hear them (peace on earth-ohh)
Peace on earth good will to men
 
And in despair I bow my head; "There is no peace on earth" I said "for hate is strong and mocks the song" of peace on earth goodwill to men
But the bells are ringing (peace on earth)
Like a choir singing (peace on earth)
Does anybody hear them? (peace on earth -ohh)
Peace on earth goodwill to men
 
Then rang the bells more loud and deep; God is not dead nor does he sleep
(Peace on earth, peace on earth)
The wrong shall fail the right prevail; with peace on earth goodwill to men
(Goodwill to man)
Then ringing singing on its way, the world revolved from night to day a voice, a chime, a chain sublime, with peace on earth goodwill to man
 
Hear Casting Crowns sing this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-150Y6Hf8ds

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You hear the Christmas story every year. Who are your favorite characters? You can't say Jesus!  Well you can, but that would be the obvious answer.  

On my gut instinct I would say Mary, after all she's really the only girl in the story.  But after having lots of chances to hear the Christmas story I would have to say that I like  the shepherds. 

In the story, you find them in the fields watching their flocks.  In pictures they're standing around with their "shepherds' crooks" waiting on wolves and stuff.  It seems like they weren't too busy.  But their job was serious business.  We know that an angel showed up and told them about the birth of the Savior. They decided to go and see.

 It doesn't sound like the shepherds wrote "Go see Jesus" on their calendar.  They didn't say, "You go, and I'll stay here with the sheep".  They didn't decide to stay where they were and send a fruit basket instead.  Luke 2:15 says that they went when the angels had left.  And it says that they"hurried".  They hurried to Jesus.  Good thinking.

They saw baby Jesus.  I don't know when they went back to what they were doing in the fields, but the Bible also tells us that they spread the word about what they had seen.  I wish I knew what they said, but whatever it was "amazed" the people they spoke with (Luke 2:18).  Out of all of the good news you've ever heard, the news that -Jesus is here with us, is the best news there is.

I know the shepherds went back to their "normal" lives though I bet their lives weren't the same.  Its says in verse 20 that even when they returned, "they were glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen".   Just because your family packs up your Christmas tree in a few weeks and "The Grinch" doesn't show up on TV for twelve months doesn't mean that the celebration is over; Jesus' coming is something to be celebrated everyday.

Just like the shepherds got an invitation to come and adore the Christ child, we have that same invitation. We have parties to go to, cookies to bake and presents to unwrap.  But let us be like the shepherds who abandoned everything to look upon a baby sent to take away the sins of the world. 

As they left, they shared Christ to a world in need.

 They did go back to their fields.  And with them, they carried the knowledge that Jesus came-for us!  

 It's news that needs to be told; a story that never gets old.

Who's your favorite Christmas character?

 

I can remember when Hayden was about four. He had his first part in a Christmas play. He was a shepherd. (maybe that's another reason I'm partial to shepherds). He only had one line in the whole play. In his most hick Texas accent he said, "Let us go to Bethlehem and see this child". I can still hear him. 

 I

 heart

shepherds.

 

 

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I'm going Christmas shopping tomorrow with someone who hates shopping.  I don't enjoy it much myself either. I'm related to some Marathon Shoppers, but I'm more like my dad who prefers sitting on the bench at Wal-Mart.

 It's too much pressure.  Either I'm locked in to the list searching for specific items that can't be found or I'm wandering aimlessly; Jason dragging his feet behind me.  Honestly, I consider myself lucky that he agrees to go with me- I'm no loner.

Seems reading my Bible I found some words procrastinating, problematic shoppers like myself might find helpful.

I'm holding these words hostage in my heart as a pre-prayer for tomorrow's trip.

The LORD your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands.

(Please let there be matrimonial harmony.  And please let their be pleasant people and short lines at the cashier,....... or patience)

He has watched over your journey through this vast desert.  (These forty years) the LORD your God has been with you, and you have not lacked anything.

 Deuteronomy 2:7

(Hoping for a not lacking anything/done at the end of the day list)

With words of assurance and my shopping buddy, I'm ready for the adventure.

This trip is in the bag.

 

 

 

 

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Shared by Ann Gattie
 
Yesterday I was running around in my normal chaotic routine. Not taking much time to think about anything outside of my to do list, dry cleaning, doctor appointment & school pick up.
 
Connor had fallen asleep in his car seat snuggled with his blanket and to the perfect rhythm of the raindrops. I wanted to snuggle up and get a cat nap, but instead I found the nearest coffee stand drive through.
 
I drove up to the cashier window, smiled a quick semi-friendly smile and handed her my money. She handed me the cup of warm caffeine for my body and some warmth for my soul...."Ma'am, the car in front of you paid for your coffee."
 
In awe, I immediately asked if I could pay for the car behind me. I wanted to return the strangers gift. I,too, wanted to share an unexpected treat and hopefully a smile for the next person.
 
The barista had a huge smile and said "This is the LONGEST line of kindness I have ever seen! This will make 10 cars in a row paying it forward!"
 
As I drove away, I thought about the impact of small gestures.
 
"I was hungry...and you fed me. I was thirsty...and you gave me drink. "
Matthew 25:35
Written so long ago, those verses seem to go back and forth quite personally as Jesus talks about himself and then so bluntly points at us. "I was...and you. "
He's putting the ball in our court or rather, pointing out by such effective use of past tense that the ball has been there all along.
 
Think about it. Everyone we encounter TODAY is an "I was" and to each of them, we are an "and you".
The stranger on the street: I was alone in the world...and you smiled at me.
The angry person at work: I was irritated and having a bad day...and you showed me grace by overlooking my attitude.
The friend: I was worried and you offered assurance.
The teen where you buy lunch: I was working my first job at a fast food restaurant, and you sought out the manager to compliment me.
Whether we want to or not, and whether we realize it or not, we are all the "And you".
By realizing it though, you'd be amazed at how many "I was" lives you can turn around.
"I felt like I was alone in the world...and your kind smile as you passed by reminded me that I wasn't"
I was...
And you...

Be an "and you" on purpose today.

Imagine the impact if we all did this.

 

This is Ann's second guest post.  It was just the cup of holiday cheer I needed.  Just a reminder, Ann is Jason's sister from Washington.  We had the pleasure of spending some days during Thanksgiving with she and her fun family.  I got to snap a few pictures of them while they were here.  I think this is just the excuse I need to show them off. (Sorry Ann, It's too early in Washington to text you and ask about the pictures 😉 ).
 
 

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God wants your mess.

Your sticky mess.

The mess you unwittingly find yourself in

and the messes you create; when you've followed a recipe for disaster

God wants your mess

The small mess

 the mess you find yourself covered in

and your mess that lands in the lap of others.

No need to try and hide it.

Didn't you know?

God's in the cleaning business.

He longs for your invitation; when you quit wiggling and squirming, trying to avoid being wiped clean.

He's waiting for you to be finished in your ill attempt at doing your own clean up.

In the most loving of voices he urges, "Hand it over.".

Create in me a clean heart, O God, Renew a loyal spirit within me. -Psalm 51:10

I'd love to chat with you or pray for you kristiburden@gmail.com