Tag Archives: gods girlies

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A friend walked into the house just yesterday.
"Smells like somebody's been baking", she said.  

"It's a lying candle," I told her.

The smell in my kitchen was nothing more than a Blueberry Blitz Tyler candle. I'm no baker.  I burn pop tarts.  The smell also covers up the large bag of garbage in the hall which holds pizza rolls, the closest I got to cooking this week. 

Recently I attended a party with peanut brittle and chocolate peanut patties. They were displayed on a festive plate wrapped with Saran wrap.  I ended up telling several people that my sweets came from Market Basket and I'd simply trashed the plastic containers. Presentation is important. Am I right? 

I don't mean to give anyone a false impression.  If I'm being honest, which I have a habit of being...... to a fault,  I'd say that the facades I present are to convince myself  (more than anyone else) that I'm everything I should be. The festive plate made me feel closer to the mark. Isn't "the mark really just that invisible success line we draw for ourselves as women? 

There's a Super Woman cape calling to me from that finish line I race toward each day, but that cape is one I'll never wear.  And I whisper to myself that I want to wear one; to show myself and the world that I take fine care of my kids and my husband. My cape will tell me what a good friend I am, and church member too.

But wearing a Super Woman cape would be a lie.

Despite my effort, I'm weak

and vulnerable and sometimes afraid;

nothing like a Super Woman, I'm insufficient on my own.

Thinking I have it all together is anything but truthful.  I'm a mess.

It's my realization of my inadequacy and my trust in one who is more than sufficient that wins me a cape; a great covering.

I possess a Super Cape.  It was given to me.  When I'm burning my lying candle at both ends, falling short, my Savior is there beside me and he covers me with that cape.  And I'm reminded that I'm enough as I remember the word spelled out in bold letters across my cape's back.........G R A C E.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

2 Corinthians 12:9

 

 

 

 

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I know you're tired

even though you went to bed last night at 8:30

and it's only a Monday.

Thing is, the tired you're feeling isn't fixed with ten hours of sleep or a fresh cup of coffee -or whatever it is that "gets you going"

You're disheartened deep down

-because for all your effort, there still remains a mountain of laundry

and a world of problems you can't solve

You're discouraged.

The word discourage is made of two parts- dis and courage.  Sorry, here comes a definition.  It's my teacher coming out.

courage /ker-ij/ mental or moral strength to persevere, and withstand danger, fear or difficulty (Thanks Merriam)

dis- (as you know) is a prefix meaning "apart"

Through calamities our moral strength is ripped apart.

You haven't experienced a calamity lately?  Even the wear and tear caused by daily demands can cause you to become unraveled.

Dirty dishes.

Bills.

Bickering around you.

Practices and appointments.

Finding the toilet unflushed for the thousandth time....

Isaiah reminds us that even the young "grow tired and weary". We get tired and we need rest, yes.   But we need something more.  When rest leaves you with a tiredness of heart, and Monday finds you anything but refreshed - hold tight to these familiar words

...those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:31

The laundry pile will never permanently disappear. That someone in your house may never learn to flush. Some real calamity may even present itself in your life. We can expect these things.  But while we know life is full of these troubles, let us look expectantly to the one who helps us through.

What has you unraveled?

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I see my children.

I saw our daughter Rylie standing rather suspiciously in the kitchen just the other day. The hand behind her back held an oatmeal cream pie with a bite missing.

Every morning I give my children a look-over. I check the boy, Hayden, for hair bumps that often arise when he lies on wet hair after his morning shower.

I see the eye makeup that our preteen Hallie is hoping I won't notice.
I am the Mom who sees.


Not only do I see my children in a gotcha sort of way,

I also see when one of them exits school with shoulders slumped slightly because it hasn't been the best day.
I watch, in adoration as Hayden and Hallie laugh in unison at a YouTube video-a beautiful sight.
I look.

I watch and I see.


Or so I'd like to think.  My kids have thrown me for a loop more than once in the past few days.
One rather long day this week I kissed my seven-year old, already in bed, goodnight, saving her bath for the morning. I noticed the next morning as she crawled out of bed that she slept in her school clothes (I probably shouldn't be telling that).
I found out another one of my children had a rough spell with a close friend months ago. How could I have missed that?


I took Rylie to the ophthalmologist this week to find out she needs glasses and an eyepatch-I was blind to her bad vision, Oh the irony. There were signs, for crying out loud.

Sometimes I blink and I miss things.

Other times there are blurry things; things foreign, unfamiliar.  

And if I'm really honest, I'd say there are times I see things which make me want to cover my eyes; things I wish I didn't have to see.

But I can rest assured in El Roi; the God who sees.

He's the God who saw Hagar in the desert when she was otherwise abandoned.

He is the one mentioned in Psalm:

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;

you are familiar with all my ways. Psalm 139:3

He sees.

Everything.

 Tears cried,

and that bad grade

 you didn't know about

that made its way to the garbage,

how your son held the door open

for the woman who could only move slowly,

 and your daughter's integrity

 in that difficult trial last week.

He knows what's under their bed.

There are no surprises.

No blinking or looking off.

He doesn't miss a thing.

He sees.

That spells b-l-e-s-s-e-d   r-e-l-i-e-f to these eyes.

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(It's 3:27 a.m. and my fingers are sleepy, doing their best to keep up with the thoughts that are flooding my mind.  This kind of writing (the kind that wakes me up) is usually the writing that I know is for me.)

I don't deal well with rudeness.  Some people wouldn't know this about me because for years I only internalized my feelings.  I'm noticing though, with age, that my filter that decides what I say and what I keep internalized is growing thinner and maybe more holey.  (I hope I don't confuse you into thinking I mean holy, I mean full of holes).

It's been a particularly busy week in which I've dealt with a lot of people; a few that were snippy and unforgiving.  With my increasing tendency to be intolerant of this behavior I'm having to adjust my rude reactor.

Reaction to Rudeness Reminders

1. A good disposition that can be easily deposed isn't really a good disposition.

I feel I'm generally pretty pleasant.  If I am in need of assistance, say in a store or in the school office, I will wait my turn.  I will make my request in an undemanding manner making it known that I appreciate that person's time and assistance.  But all it takes is a sideways glance from that person, conveying "You're wasting my time" or "STUPID question!" and my sweet disposition has crumbled.  If a look, or a lack of response to my kindness ruins my mood, then my mood needs to grow some muscles.

  2.Reciprocal rudeness is still rude.

 Reciprocal rudeness-when someone is rude and you're rude back.  Wednesday I was about to pull into Dairy Queen.  A lady in front of me on the opposite side of the road had her left blinker on to turn in to DQ.  She assumed I was going to turn in before she got her chance; that I was getting ready to "cut" her in line.  I don't read lips that well, but she was definitely cursing me waving her arms about wildly.  So I felt the need to return the theatrics by making my eyes big and mouthing dramatically, "I SEE YOU"! ( In other words, settle down I'm waiting for you).  My words were unnecessary and unkind. Rudeness is rude if you start it or not.

3. A smile has more value when it's given to the seemingly undeserving.

...... I will forget my complaint, change my expression and smile. Job 9:27

It's easy to smile when things are going your way; when you're around pleasant people.  But there are some people who are just emotionally draining.  They're negative.  They can be unresponsive or over- reactive.  When your smile has been challenged with someone rude, smile anyway.  Make it not about you and how someone has made you feel.

4.People who are unmerciful are typically the ones who need to be shown mercy.

 I explained to one of my kids yesterday that I was sorry for being grumpy, but that I'd had a long hard week. The point? You don't know what the person with a snarky  attitude may have been through five minutes before you encountered them. That person that always seems snippy or combative for no apparent reason may be may be suffering in a way you couldn't imagine.

In the words of Jesus:

....bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you

If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

Luke : 6: 28, 32, 36

5.  Have your "unhappy dialogue" with God.

There's always an unhappy dialogue when I've dealt with someone rude.  In my weakest moments I snip back at that person or act more cool, dropping the warm smile.  My encounters with rudeness are also usually shared with those I am close to.  This is where, still fuming, I share what "I should have said back to that person".  There is no one who is more worth sharing your "unhappy dialogue" with, than Jesus.  He is the diffuser of anger.  Time with him allows me to refuel on love; the kind of love that's unaffected by the thing we call "feelings".

How do you deal with rudeness?

Or is there another behavior that drives you bonkers?

 

 

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To be a kid

Undaunted by failure

Not a slave to the clock

Footloose and fancy-free

 Mind fresh with imagination

To a kid

Dirty hands are a sign of a good time

 and " mess" has no meaning

Weeds don't exist and flowers are for picking

 Stray animals and drawings are worth saving

A kid believes

that green beans might be the worst thing out there

And cookies and hugs make everything better

 Kids live in a world where

Every day is cloudless, even the rainy ones

"Where troubles melt like lemon drops"

 Where beauty is experienced,

 and not just admired or envied

Forgiveness comes without thought

and love is the only four-letter word

  I think I want to be a kid when I grow up.

13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.    Psalm 139:13, 14

What is your favorite kid quality?

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Spoiler Alert: You see the words on movie reviews.  These words are cautionary.  Stop!  Don't read ahead unless you want the element of surprise ripped from your movie-watching experience.

These words don't scare me, rather they excite!

The spoiler alert usually provides me with needful information: Is the movie worth it?  If the main character dies in vain?......I'm not watching it.  If the star-crossed lovers don't get together in the end?......Why waste my time? I'm looking for the good ending.

There is something better than the element of surprise.

Anticipation!

I've watched Pride and Prejudice forty times (in fact I might watch it again today).  It doesn't bother me in the least that I know the last five minutes of the movie by heart:

Spoiler Alert:  Elizabeth is up, though it's barely dawn.  She's wrapped in a shawl, taking a walk (she's fond of walking).  It's clear now that her prejudice toward the wealthy and handsome Mr. Darcy was, in fact, wrong.  And she is uncomfortably aware of her feelings for him.  Mr. Darcy is also unable to sleep.  He hastens across the field to Elizabeth's side determined to declare his undying love once more.... This time his love is not refused.

 

Good endings make the painful parts bearable.

"This is my message to you:

Don't worry

 about a thing

cause every little thing

gonna be alright"...

(Apparently I know a Bob Marley song.  Oops. Oh well- seems appropriate)

Life is indeed a mystery.  There are twists and turns in which we find ourselves unprepared for.  In life we celebrate unexpected joys, and suffer miseries unimagined.  Life is more beautiful and worthwhile with the knowledge that its dips and climbs are commenced by an everlasting joy.

God's been good enough to give us a spoiler alert.  Dare to read ahead.

“Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. 4 ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’[b] or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

Revelation 21:3,4

We, in Christ, have an ending worth anticipating; pain-free and joy-full

 an un-ending, ending.

 

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We all face giants; they tower and taunt leaving us feeling hopeless and small.

Worry may be your giant. Though you know God is faithful, you may doubt.

Ironically, feeling inadequate is one of my giants.  Who knew feeling small could be a giant?

Getting out of my feelings, might I suggest that junk food is a giant I battle too? Giants come in different names and sizes. But I might mention that Goliath, the Philistine giant told about in 1 Samuel 17,  is in every way like the giants we face.

Giants press close.

v. 41 Meanwhile the Philistine, with his shield-bearer in front of him, kept coming closer to David

v. 48 ..... the Philistine moved closer to attack him....

What better way to loom large?  Giants come close.  With no regard for safe space, giants inch-in to intimidate.  As they become intimate, they know your weak spot and that's where you get hit.

Giants are persistent.

v. 16 For forty days the Philistine came forward every morning and every evening and took his stand.

v. 23 Goliath, the Philistine champion from Gath, stepped out from his lines  and shouted his usual defiance....

v. 25 "Do you see how this man keeps coming out"...

Those giants we face don't leave without a fight.  My giant, worry, meets me at every corner.  Some giants meet us every morning.  Giants aren't easily frightened or phased. Some giants temporarily defeated come back, again......and again. 

What seems to be a new giant is usually much like an old giant.  All giants can be fought in much the same way, as we're told by David:

 34  When a lion or a bear came and carried off a sheep from the flock, 35 I went after it, struck it and rescued the sheep from its mouth. When it turned on me, I seized it by its hair, struck it and killed it. 36 Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, because he has defied the armies of the living God. 37 The Lord who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine.”

The bad news is; we face the same type of "giant" over and over. 

The good news is:  We have the same mighty line of defense (God) for each giant and every battle.

 Maybe most comforting, we never face giants alone.

David's counterparts seemed to have forgotten.  Sometimes I seem to forget.  God won't allow a giant in your midst that he won't help you battle. 

Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.  Joshua 1:9

 

 

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To the tender-hearted; those who hurt deep for the broken , and to the mamas and dads who would move mountains for your children, and for the plain-old stubborn "fixers"....this is for you ( and me, REALLY me)

 

I sit here with a screw driver, a broken toy and my typical determination.  I will fix this.

The kids got gift cards for Christmas.  I took them shopping this past Saturday to spend them.  Rylie wanted a giant stuffed dog, but instead I talked her into a small remote-controlled princess carriage/boat.  The boat made one excursion in the bathtub before it ceased its moving.  Jason and I worked Sunday to get it going again.  We turned it off and on at least twelve times and checked the batteries. It was when Jason shook the small toy that he could hear that the inner parts of the toy were somehow disconnected.

Being the persistent girl that I am, I started in again this morning.  With screw driver in hand, I proceeded to take the tiny boat apart.  If I could get inside, surely I could connect the parts that had somehow become disassembled.  No such luck. The toy was built so that it couldn't be taken apart.  The toy sits in front of me as a symbol of frustration and disappointment.

  I want to fix it.

I will work until I fix it.

I won't rest until I fix it.

I will hurt until its fixed.

This is my approach to broken things and broken loved-ones.  

I haven't fixed the toy boat and yet this time, I've allowed it to remain in my sight unfixed.  In the stillness I hear a whisper......  You can't fix everything

Sometimes you're just not strong enough

My brokenness isn't about just me and you

You CAN'T fix me just right-there's something broken in a deep place that you can't reach

and by trying, you become worn out and defeated often forgetting THE fixer, the healer

Put down your tools.  Cease your working.  Rest in Him who heals.  Trust that He is at work in the broken, including you.

...not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord of hosts

 Zechariah 4:6

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us,.... to Him be the glory

 Ephesians 3:20, 21b

All that is broken belongs to Jesus

 

 

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This is a  devotion/activity that would be a great activity for families or Sunday School too. 

Items needed:

Necco Conversation Hearts (Sweethearts)                 Activity Sheet

Bibles                                                                                  Pens or markers

Devotion below  

Conversation Hearts -Devotion

Have you ever tasted the chalky candies you get only around Valentine's Day; you know, the colored hearts that say things like "Luv Ya" or "You Rock" and "Be Mine"?  Sweethearts, or Conversation hearts have been around for years, like over a hundred years.

Some of the hearts from the earlier times  had sayings like  "Sweet Talk" and "Dig Me".

These candy messages go out of style, and so every year the candy makers print new messages.  In the past few years you might have seen the words

Dream

Honey Bun

Melt My Heart

Chill Out

Text Me

LOL

(Allow the children to read a few messages on the candy)

There are a few things the candy makers, Necco, keep in mind when writing on candy hearts.

 

*Nothing rude or distasteful should go on the candies

*Only a few words will fit on each candy (no more than 3)

 

Ok, let' s hear it.  What message in one, two or three words would you put on candy hearts if the candy company called you up and asked?

While it would be fun if you got a phone call from the candy-making headquarters putting you in charge of this year's messages, it matters little what the candy hearts say on them.  Why?  Because they're eaten right after you read their message; some of you might not even take the time to read them at all.

Human hearts aren't quite the same. What is written on our hearts is of great importance.  God tells us:

 Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.  Proverbs 3:3

 

Our hearts are like tablets

and YOU get to write words on your heart,......God told you to.

 Where would be the right place to find good words for your heart's tablet?  What are two good words mentioned in the verse above? (read verse again)

1. Love

2. Faithfulness

Remember that God's word, the Bible, is the best place to find words to be written on your heart.  But don't forget, others write on our hearts too; sometimes beautiful words and other times words that hurt.  Surround yourself with people who write good words on your heart.  There are adults all around you dying to write messages of love on your hearts.  There's plenty of room; let them.

 

Activity:

Take a piece of printer paper. Fold a piece of paper long-ways and write candy heart messages on one side and God's messages on the other side. I found these Conversation Heart stickers in the Target Dollar Section (love that place).  For a dollar, you get more than a hundred stickers.  These brightened up the page and made it easier for the younger ones who are still slow writers.

1.On the left side write a few of the messages found on Necco candy hearts .

2. On the right side, write in a few one or two-word messages that God would have you write on your heart. Ex. "Grace"  "Pray 4 Others"

Here are a few verses if you need help:

But with you there is forgiveness, so that we can, with reverence, serve you,  Psalm 130:4

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control....Galatians 5:22, 23b

Now use your bible and find a few others.

After the activity:

Discuss in group

We know we can't reach in with a pen or marker and write on our actual heart.  What does it mean to write God's commandments and words on our hearts? (wait for answer)

 Did you also notice that Proverbs 3:3 and other verses tell us to bind God's words (commandments) around our necks.  When we put something, like a necklace, around our neck, it goes with us wherever we go.  God wants us to carry His words with us.  He wants His words and His message to be in our hearts and to be shown to others.

Which messages don't go out of style, candy hearts or God's messages?

How can having these messages (or words) written on your heart change

the way you talk to others?

the way you treat others?

the way you live?

Close in prayer.
 
Let's Stay Connected


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Silence.  It's ironic to talk about it.  But I will.

It may come as no surprise that I like to talk.

I remember a grueling silence my first year of teaching.  I had witnessed a situation involving a fellow teacher and an administrator's son. In question was a refused bird house entry into a contest. I was the key witness in the matter.

The principal sat with his fist neatly folded as he looked at me from the other side of his desk stone-faced.  I told what I had observed.  As I finished, he stared, wordless.  My mind quickly raced.  (Was I leaving out any important information? Was he wanting my opinion?) He continued his gaze while I squirmed in the nothingness.  And then I did what any normal person would do.  I started relaying the same account; again.

He cut me off about twenty seconds into my replay,  "You don't have to talk.  I heard you the first time".

No words have caught me quite off-guard like those words.  It's fourteen years later and I remember that conversation (if that's what you call it).  Of course it hasn't stopped me from telling and retelling even life's mundane events; sharing my thoughts on things earth shattering to the trivial.  My Dad has said my mom and I take longer to tell things than the actual event.

I talk too much when I'm nervous.

And I talk too much when I'm perfectly comfortable.

Because of my incessant talking, I listen too little.

Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him. -Proverbs 29:20  Youch!!! (exclamation and emphasis mine)

A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.  -Proverbs 18:2

My prayer?  I don't exactly know;  I'm trying to say less. I simply know that anything God has to say, holds more value than my babbling and even my most thought-out words.  I want to learn to be silent.  And in the silence I want to hear.

I can't get out of my mind a time when I let silence speak.  A young woman I had never met, lost her four-year old son in a drowning accident.  He was in Hallie's Pre-K class.  Jason did the funeral.  I had rehearsed, as I often do, what I would say to her given the chance.  Those attending, exited by the casket to give their condolences to the grief-stricken woman. I knew that I had nothing to say though my heart ached for her.  So I simply grabbed her hand and held it for what seemed like eternity. It was one of the most powerful moments of my life.  In the silence God spoke for me.  He spoke to me.  That moment speaks to me still.

When have you been spoken to in the silence?