Tag Archives: children

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My last post was a reminder that our children do notice.  They notice what we say. They notice what we do.  They even notice what we don't do.  (Hayden commented yesterday they we don't pray enough together -ouch.).  Today it sounds as if I'm telling you the opposite.  Today I'm saying that even though our children know our habits, we don't always see them practice what we practice or what we preach.  Sadly they seem to mimic the very things we wish they wouldn't.

 

As soon as I finished the Mini Me post, I remembered a sweet picture that Hallie drew for me several years ago.  Thankfully I found it with a few minutes of searching.  The picture is a treasure-To Mom From your Mini Me.  Those of you who know Hallie, know that she has always been a distinct individual;seemingly unimpressionable.  She has always had a strong sense of who she is up until recently.  Now in Middle School there are so many voices calling out to her.  Voices suggesting what activities she should participate in, what music she should listen to, the best shows to watch on TV.  She sees that she is supposed to bunch up the corner of her shirt with a rubber band making a tail.   Those shoes she found detestable last August are suddenly cute.  I am right beside her, but outside influences design her current world..

This picture is simple; Hallie and I standing, all smiles at the end of the rainbow.  A rainbow has forever served as a reminder of God's promise.  I did a parenting Bible Study called Value-Packed Parenting by Kevin Lehman.  The most important thing I remember from the study was the analogy made using a suitcase.  He compared all of the values that we instill in our children as items being placed in a suitcase.  Our children don't necessarily always hold dear those values while at home.  It is when they leave home that they often unpack those values. A rainbow signifies a journey.   While I would like to see Hallie and the other two applying values here and now, I need not lose heart when it seems the things we've taught them are now little more than a buzz in the ear.   We have them in our care for eighteen years.  We need to remember that it takes longer than we'd like- to teach them some things.

Start children off on the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it. -Proverbs 22:6  Did you catch the "when they are old" part?  Hang in there mom and dad.  God's word also says, " For I know the plans I have for you"' declares the Lord, " plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."'  -Jeremiah 29:11   Though our children sometimes seem to listen to everybody but us, God has plans.  Her peers may color who she is now, but Jason and I are with her for the journey.  We get to be there when those long ago spoken truths begin to inform and transform. But we must also be faithful to pray for our children.

.Those of you familiar with the late seventies or Kermit the Frog may remember the song The Rainbow Connection.  The lyrics are hard to follow, but I like the last stanza. It sounds to me as if the voice comes straight from the soul of a child.

... Have you been half asleep? And have you heard voices? I've heard them calling my name. ... Is this the sweet sound that calls the young sailors? The voice might be one and the same I've heard it too many times to ignore it It's something that I'm s'posed to be... Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection, The lovers, the dreamers, and me.

Hold tight.  Pray.  Teach them. Be that still quiet voice that has been heard too many times to ignore; the voice that helps show them who they are supposed to be.  In the picture, at the end of the rainbow, it's my hand that Hallie is holding.  The colors that now capture our children's attention will be like a rainbow that suddenly evaporates.  When the rainbow fades, our voice and values will remain.  We will see those plans the Lord had for our children coming to fruition.  I am secure in their future and thankful for the promise. Trust and see beauty in the journey!

 

 

 

 

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Confession:  I have an unhealthy affection for Dr. Pepper.  I drink way too many.  I’ve tried to stop drinking so many; numerous times.  I’ve tried the lesser calorie version, Dr. Pepper 10, which people have told me is man’s Dr. Pepper; whatever.  I’ve tried cutting back.  Probably least effective, I’ve quit cold turkey, for like two days.  Moving on we’ll get to the real point; this problem is for a different post.  But seriously, pray for me.

This past December I was a part of the Tour of Homes sponsored by our church.  I agreed to decorate my home for the sake of fundraising for missions with the help of my dear friends Larry and Carol Hathaway.  For several weeks, they graciously brought decorations from their home as the extent of my decorating is putting up stockings and a tree.

I’ve always said you know a person better after spending time in their home.   One day after seeing me open the second Dr. Pepper can by lunch, Larry asked me if I was addicted.  I acknowledged without hesitation that I might have a slight problem.  The next question was a bit harder to answer.  Larry asked, “Do your kids drink sodas like that too?”  After thinking a moment I shook my head no.  The same afternoon I brought Rylie home from Kindergarten.  Hayden and Hallie get out thirty minutes later.   Most afternoons, Rylie and I get a little snack as we like to celebrate our “just us” time together.  With Carol and Larry wrapping up the days decorating, Rylie walks in the front door.  She walks straight to the refrigerator and pulls out a…….. (You got it) Dr. Pepper.  To make matters worse, she taps the top of the can twice like some junkie while I’m thinking 1. Not in front of Larry 2.Do I do the tapping thing?  Larry looks at me and without a word says “mmm hmmmm”.

First, you have to know that I don’t allow the kids to break out a Dr. Pepper any time they want.  They can have one a day which I know many of you will think is unhealthy; I can understand that viewpoint completely. Lucky for me, I have the Dr. Pepper Snapple Group on my side.   Formulators of the recipe of Dr. Pepper recipe have insisted that it is medicinal in nature and aids in digestion.   Sincerely speaking, I’m not worried so much about my kids having a soda.  This can-tapping moment however did get me to thinking.

Do I flippantly and mindlessly lead my kids?  I would never pretend to be perfect in front of them or anybody else, but that’s not what I mean.  Possibly the deeper question is, am I truly the example I need to be?  I know that my kids see what I watch on TV.  They also hear me growl and gripe when someone dares to drive too slow in front of me.  They have witnessed me act like all is lost when supper turns out a flop.  They have suffered me losing it when their rooms are atrocious.  Does this put me on the Worst Mother of the Year list?  Certainly not.  But in thinking on all these things my children see, I’m wondering; are they seeing in me- a desire for and dependence on God?  I found a couple of convicting quotes I’d like to share.

 

What the daughter does, the mother did. –Jewish Proverb

And mothers are their daughters’ role model, their biological and emotional road map, the arbiter of all their relationships. –Victoria Secunda

Another frightening thought is that our boys may look to us as the measure of what a woman should be as he looks to a future marriage.

I don’t know about you, but when I have somebody else’s child in my care, I seem to be a little more attentive.  I drive a little more carefully.  I try to feed them well.  I am intentional in providing a safe nurturing and wholesome place.  My children are mine only on gracious loan.  I know they look somewhat like Jason and I.  I see certain facial expressions in them and see Jason.  I hear phrases that are echoes from my own voice.  Mini me.  Mini Jason.  And while this brings about a certain pride, it again brings about the question:  Do I want them to be like me?  Should I be mirroring Jesus more closely?   I want my children to be able to see Jesus in me.  I want to be the example.  I told you how I love Dr. Pepper; can’t get enough.  No Diet or Dr. Pepper 10; I want no lesser version.  I pray in all earnesty that I would hold for my life the same mark.  If my children are to be my mini me, I want more of Jesus. I have to know I can’t get enough.  I need to remember I want no lesser version.  I don’t want a “Sunday Jesus” or a “help me when I’m in a bind” Jesus.  More important than what my children are watching me do, is maybe WHO I'M WATCHING..

To you , O LORD, I lift up my soul……Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths….My eyes are ever on the LORD…..    Psalm 25:1, 4, 15

The meaning of the word Christian is “little Christ”.

May I look to you and listen for your voice with a steadfast devotion that would bit by bit transform me into a mini you!

Couldn' resist putting this one.  Don't know who looks like who.

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While I'm on a celebratory roll I thought I'd add two other fun items we use at home for  special moments.

I don't feel the need to break out the fine china very often, but this celebrate glass has been a special treat for birthdays.  I got this on Boston Ave. at Occasions.  We would be using it tonight if we weren't going out this evening to celebrate.  -No birthdays but someone redeemed themself this week by making a very much needed eighty-eight on an important test.

I might as well keep this party banner hanging right where it is.  In the last month I've used it for Jason's birthday, my Spring Retreat peeps and for some of our God's Girlies who met here on a Saturday.  I know all of you out there could probably make one of these.  I, on the other hand, am not crafty. I work with hot glue, spray paint and sharpies only- which I believe can fix everything in life that chocolate can't.

With all of the pomp and circumstance I always have to remind the kids and myself  that all victories belong to God; each success  is a gracious gift.

Ascribe to the LORD glory....Psalm 29:1

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Hooray! Summer's coming!

I do love summer, but I have to tell you the months of April and May can be depressing. I feel particularly somber when loved ones are approaching the end of a chapter.  With many nieces and nephews, somebody is always finshing elementary or finishing high school.  I've taught elemtary for a few years and it saddens me that yesterday's toothless babies are graduating and some are even having babies of their own.  Last May Hallie finished elementary and Hayden finshed junior high.  This May our last baby will graduate from Kindergarten (I don't know if I can handle another one of those videos with the background music intended to make you bawl).  I absolutely know that in these times I should celebrate.  I should focus on exciting beginnings just around the corner. I am renewing a commitment to show joyful satisfaction even as the sand slips through the hourglass. I wanted to share a tradition in our family that helps us to celebrate endings, beginnings and things in-between.

When each of the kids were young I got them their own special book.  We read the book on special occasions and sometimes just because.  I've come to realize it's easy to make ordinary times into extraordinary with a little creativity.  And honestly, I'd be remiss not to celebrate my children every day!

Every time their special book is read, we write in the book cover.  The date and the occasion is written down.  Some of my favorites include:

-January 14, 2009 Nap story

-September 26, 2010 Just because I love you

-September 4, 2007 Second week of fifth grade  You lost a tooth and reminded me to read.

-April 11, 2006 You read to your Dad for his thirtieth birthday

-March 27, 2011 A can of hairspray emptied in your backpack the one time your borrowed the school's video camera.

-August 2011 Tomorrow is the first day of Middle School at C.O. Wilson- Go Bullpups!!!

 

The book pictured at the top is Hooray for You!  A Celebration of You-ness by Marianne Richmond.  I STILL read it to Hayden (nobody mention this to his friends!).

The girls' book is I Love You So also written by Marianne Richmond.

 

There are so many awesome books out there.  I may post a couple of personal favorites.  I've recently been considering buying an inexpensive Bible for each of the kids.  I think it would be extra-meaningful to not only write dates as we read scripture, but also a side-note like:

3/25/12 Lucky the Goldfish died

4/16/12 Failed a Math test

4/01/12 Had a fight with your best friend

2/17/12 You helped clean the kitchen

Remember to celebrate successes.  Don't forget the little ones.  And maybe most importantly, celebrate God's grace in those not -so-great moments.

Children are a gift from God.

And with a good gift comes celebration!

A picture of Hayden and Hallie on Kindergarten graduation day.

 (picture of Rylie soon to come)

 

 

 

 

 

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At a recent Mom’s prayer meeting we were praying for a couple of moms who were having difficulty getting their kiddos into the car-seat without a struggle.   I remember those frustrating days.  I also remember momentarily feeling some instant freedom when my children were out of car-seats and could buckle themselves in.  But as I was praying with these moms I was overcome with sadness.  My kids aren’t car-seat babies anymore.  And while I don’t have to buckle them in, I CAN’T buckle them in anymore.

Hayden will be sixteen in six months.  I won’t always be able to be in the car to tell him to slow down a little quicker when approaching an intersection.  Soon when he is finding that special someone, I don’t get to tell him she’s not enough like me.  Hallie recently shared a secret with a friend.  When I asked her to share it with me she said NO!  In the last couple of years some tears have been shed.  I haven’t always been next to Hallie, tissue in hand, there to hug her.  When Rylie is at school reading and she comes to a word she doesn’t know, I’m not there to sound the word out with her part by part.  I have lunch with her at school every Monday while volunteering.  Are they always going to let me do that?   Is she always going to WANT me to do that?  The awful part is, physically and later geographically, the distance will grow as time goes on.

I am thankful that even though my children are growing tall and independent, they still lavish me with hugs.  Hayden still puts his arm around me at church. Rylie still crawls in our bed occasionally in the morning.  Hallie, our most independent child, spends special girl time just with me once a week.  And they all still sometimes hold my hand.

 

While in the car alone this evening, I heard a song.  Instantly I thought of my children. There are times when they will face trials and feel alone. There have already been those times. There are times when I can’t be there; times I can’t fix it- I would if I could. There are times I’ve been the one to let them down.  I am more than grateful that I have the blessed assurance that God IS there.  The God who sees is with Hayden when he takes that frightening Math test.  He is with Hallie when she sits alone.  He is right beside Rylie in Sunday School as she is learning who he is.

 

I’m a little jealous that God sees and knows their every step.  He has stolen their hearts, but how can I complain when he has given me eternity with him and with them.  I pray that every day on this side of eternity this song would be the song of their heart:

Click here:  all this time

My phone wouldn't upload this video.  If you have the same problem you can go to the youtube link and search- All This Time Britt Nicole

www.youtube.com

                      

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A post from a sweet friend:

From my Kieran's journal today...... 

I want to be a preacher.  Why?   Because Preachers teach about God and tell you God is your Savior.  Preachers are nice.  You can count on them to help you out in tuff times.  Preachers are awesome.  I am happy I am making this decision because Preachers make big differences in your life, like mine and when I am a Preacher you never know, I might make alot of people happy and make lots of differences in lots of peoples lives.  Someday people will know me as Brother Droddy.

Kieran Droddy

March 2012-3rd grade 

This boy is so in love with Jesus right now.  I pray that he will always be.  I never prayed for my kids to be star athletes or straight A students.....never prayed that they would be popular or make the winning touchdown.....win first place ribbons or become famous.....I have always simply and passionately prayed that they love love love Jesus......that they know Him and love Him.....that he order their steps and that they have the wisdom to follow and the discernment to know where he is leading them.....I want them to be good husbands and fathers and good wives and mothers....these words have been my prayers for 15 years of mothering....Fifteen joyful, hard, sad, happy exhausting years of motherhood.....and they will be my prayers for many many more years to come......Tears poured down my face today as he read this to me, tears from a Momma's heart that saw her prayers turning into fruition right before her eyes as she heard her little boy read words straight from his innocent heart, words this his Savior put in his soul and words that he obediently put on paper....I can not wait to see what God is preparing for him!  I hope his sweet words bless you as much as they blessed me and Eric.

I think I may be partial to preachers so naturally I melted when I read this. What sweet words. Kieran wants to be a preacher and I think that's amazing, but its not just because he wants to be a preacher. Hayden shared a few years ago that he was not going to be a preacher. I quickly told him that I do not want him to be a preacher " just beacuse his dad is". I also told him that I don't want him to NOT become a preacher "just because his dad is". My prayer is that he (and Hallie and Rylie) would have a sensitivity to God's presence and work in their lives even now. I pray that they will be so in love with Jesus that they will know Him well enough that following His will in their lives will be natural and a joy. How refreshing that Kieran has embraced what he believes God wants him to do, and he sounds a little excited!

Lisa's recounting her persistent prayer for her children made me smile all the more. What else would we need pray for? {that our children would LOVE LOVE LOVE Jesus}. I could pray without ceasing and not be profiting my children like this prayer. Lord please help Hallie find friends. Please help Hayden focus at school. I pray that Rylie will find joy in reading. These are good and needful prayers, but we can't neglect this simple prayer. And we would do well to pray it over and over. You read the Bible with your kids-super. You pray with them-that's great. You're being a great example of loving Jesus-awesome! Keep it up, but I'm thankful for the reminder to come before our God asking for His help in our children coming to love him in an ever-increasing fashion. I love my husband and I love my children. Embarrassingly but probably not alone I admit that there are many times I have to pray that God will help me to love them. Love them even though I may be mad. Love on them though I may be really busy. Take time to love them even though their way is not my way. Likewise with loving Jesus we need his help to love him in trying and busy times. And I can guarantee that these are the times our children are in. Hope you find Kieran's declaration and Lisa's devotion refreshing as I did.

*Interestingly my next devotion has been written on letting go our golden dream only to embrace the riches God has planned for us. The Parable of the Golden Ticket shows a parallel between Charlie in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and hopefully us as we relinquish our "golden ticket" only finding that what we gave up pales in comparison to what God has in store for us. We all want our children to be "A" students with awesome looks and style, superb athletic ability and a host of friends and admirers. Let us not cling to those hopes like we cling to the hope that they would LOVE LOVE LOVE Jesus.